The Petrovs

The Family Petrov

The diseased Petrov family tree traces roots back to eastern Europe in the late sixteen-hundreds. Recognized as noble and peace-loving farmers, their reputation was forever tainted when adopted son, Ivalor Petrov’s sadism and depravity resulted in his entire family being murdered by an angry mob. Ivalor survived and made his way to the Americas where he started over.

He died most unpleasantly of dysentery of at the age of 22, boasting of having killed three people for each month he’d been alive. His descendents live in this house.


The Petrov family patriarch loves and protects his family. Everybody else, not so much. Almost always seen with his axe in his hand, it’s in fact probably true that he never puts it down. He simply enjoys chopping, be it trees, little furry animals, or people, which he then feeds to his family. The people or furry animals, not the trees.

Sweet Mama Mable

The only person to ever call her Sweet Mama is Mable herself. Prone to bouts of loneliness and having strong appetites for many things, being with other men excites her. Knowing that Pa might catch her in the act excites her even more. And knowing what Pa will do to her lover if he catches them together, that’s what really gets her off.

Mable frequently drinks the blood of virgins, preferably young women, with the belief that it both keeps her young and beautiful and that it gives her her strong appetites.

Closet Girl

This pitiful child was never hugged growing up. She was, in fact, never shown any love or attention at all. She was never even given a name. Simply dumped in her closet, now the only place she feels safe, where the other family members bring her food but rarely give her the love she deeply craves.

One thing they never do, is allow her to have any knives or sharp objects. Closet Girl loves cutting things. Be it herself, paper, or other people.

Sobbing Sally

Sally was one half of two perfectly contented babies. Neither twin ever cried, not once in their first six months of life. Then her sister died unexpectedly – simply not wanting to go on anymore – and Sally cried continuously for the next twelve years of her life, earning her the nickname Sobbing Sally. Now, the only time she stops crying is when she’s looking to take her sadness out on others. And that’s when she’s most dangerous.

Aside from crying, Sally enjoys pretending that she’s one of her favourite heroes from her children’s books: vampires or zombies. This coincides well with one of the only things that still gives her joy, eating.

Brother Isaiah

One of the smartest members of the Petrov family, Isaiah started reading when he was two years old. The first book he ever read was the Bible, King James version, and it remains the only book he’s ever read. He particularly likes the violent parts. Isaiah now eats, sleeps, breathes, and kills religion, having taken the Bible as his personal mission statement.

Not a true brother in any recognized religion, Isaiah is nonetheless fully devoted to making God’s will manifest.

Aunt Helena

Helena grows on a distant branch of the Petrov family tree. She was exiled from her village in the old country for doing her duty – which she believed was to use her family magics to create as much misery and suffering as possible.

With her young daughter in tow, she crossed the ocean to stay with the only family she had left. And has been making their lives miserable ever since.

Hannah’s Ghost

Unlike her mother Helena, Hannah was never good at magic. Instead she found other ways to amuse herself, almost always at the expense of somebody else. Other people’s trouble is something that never fails to amuse her.

She died mysteriously at the young age of 16 and has been confined to the house ever since. A fate that she finds truly boring.

The Prisoner

Not even he could tell you how long he’s been chained in the Petrov family basement, or why he came to be there in the first place, or his name, but it has been long enough that he considers it home. He undoubtedly has a strong case of Stockholm syndrome but he’d probably kill any doctor who tried to classify him.

The one certain thing is that he’s family.